joy? sad ?

15012010

Its a friday night . Went doctor just now with allen's accompany .

Actually i can cope alone with this . Weather its a joyness or sadness, i can cope alone ..

Even without wl , i guess .

Result - Negative.

Doctor say come back for a check up in another 2 week

I don't know why the anxiousness too . Why the upset too .

I'm not even afraid to let anyone know about this . Not even dad and mum ..

Ask me why ? The answer's deep inside my heart ..

Is this the only way to communicate with you ?

Is that the only topic with you? It doesn't matter what the result will be .

For this , why don't you give me more concern.

Perhap i'm really stubborn , stupid and silly ..

when it comes to you ..

It needs more then courage to text you .

Need alot more when i look you into your eye .

Need more then what i can give , to look into your heart .

PS: I can feel it coming .Tell me , am i supposed to feel happy or upset .

If menses comes , telling myself it's a full stop between me and him .

Maybe only myself .. 

Well , At least i felt the feeling of it (':

Chapter closing , soon