(:

Went PH last night with him,pz and jason.As usual ,saw a number of friends there . There wasn't really alot of liquor on our table but our dave end up being drunk . Haha . Because we end up sitting at his friend's table with vodka and champange .Not only 1 !
Am going to KL tomorrow morning . Ughh ! Am going to miss you so much !! Will you?
Anyway last night was fun though i'm not feeling that well and kinda tired actually .

Love , I love the way you held on to my hand . Thanks for letting me be there when you need me . you asked me this question last night . " Will anyone actually understand the pain you going thru now?" Yes , i do . Because i'm there to suffer and be with you . Let me be your eye when you can't see clearly . Let me be your lip when you can't speak properly . Let me be your hands when you can't control physically. Let me be your mind when you can't think emotionally . Let me be there (: And i'm there to guild you through the journey home . And trust me , i'll be here .

I swear i'm going to miss you . Make sure you keep your ass clean till i'm back ! If not i'm sure gonna get you and kill you !!! (:  Have fun here in singapore !

Peizhen uh ! Stop crying because of him man ! (:
Sara Moi ! Hehe , enjoying now huh ?! Haha .

YOU TOLD ME I'M IMPORTANT TO YOU , DO YOU MEAN WHAT YOU SAID?

KNN

Know what ? My memory card turn her back on me all of a sudden . It just dead off like this . without telling me :( Now , i lost all my photos and songs and my videos ! I"LL MAKE SURE I'LL CHOP IT INTO PIECES !!!!

DO you even have the guts?

Been sick this 2 days . Brain's abit laggy now ~ Had a super nice sleep last night (:

Went to meet allen yesterday for lunch at Pizza Hut . Then to library . (:

Had a number of trouble these few days . His problem , friends problem ..

If you love me , then prove it to me by actions .
If not , just let us be seperated then . It's all this that's pushing me .

I love you though .

You told me to give me SOMEMORE time , which i had given you alot i guess .

WHAT YOU NEED WASN'T TIME

BUT GUTS !

Ugh . one more photo but cannotbe upload ! Knn.

the love

Thank you for teaching me to be strong,
Thank you for being there when I need you the most,
Thank you for listening to my boring, non-stop talks,
Thank you for being my friend, my family, my motivator, my lover,
Thank you for the patience that you have been shown,
Thank you for the time that you have spent for me,
Thank you for the things that you give it to me, I keep it as my treasure,
Thank you for your kind and tenderness, it touch my heart,
Thank you for your attention that you shower me with,
Thank you for the sweet memories that we share together,
Thank you for your Love.
I love you. I do.

We have come this far together . It have to end someday . Because you know there's still a girl waiting for you at home . Baby , trust me , it hurts me more than a million when i say all this . But i have to .. Because someone have to make a move . Trust me for that i love you that much . ('':

Deep and Meaningless

If i need you now , will you come?

Been long since i came in here . There's so much to say , so much to tell . About everyone in my life  About him about her about all my friends and beloved .
Everyone changed well , including myself . Weather to bad or to good , it doesn't really matters afterall . Because my birth certificate will always be mine ! (:
Well , about my life ? Messed up ? Or rather should i say it's just not the same as i used to be . Clubbing life and etc . Sara , you don't have to feel bad about what's been going on with me . Because i chose it myself isn't it . I mean i don't regret doing all this at all . Why not , if i could really be happy for just that few hours?
(: I'll still be there if you need me .

Anyway , i watched that movie - The Last Song . How should i say about it ? It's actually really alright only . Not as expected . Met him out for his interview , so went for lunch at Funan 99 coffee shop . Memories are so beautiful , untill it's too clear for me not to push it away . Memories stayed (: Always . You know i'm saying about you , yes it's you . The off to do his stuff . And went home for a rest . After that to Mac , for chilling and have his work done. I knew something's not really right when he told me he wanted to go to my place to sleep . So he's meeting her later . Well , i'm not angry .

She's your girl . I'm a friend . Thats the different here ..

Silent means consent.

It's always so nice to have someone tracking you all the way then someone who don't even know there's this song in your blogger . Well , i'm not giving any shit anymore . If he wanna meet then we meet if not just do what we want , ourselves . Moving one step forward it's way too far easy but not when you have to step back. The most terrible thing is waiting but then again , there's nothing else to do other then waiting .

Everyone has their problem , i know you have yours but i have mine too . (:

I'm not thinking as much as i used to. Not talking so much either . Because if the line aren't clear enough , there's nothing we could talk about . Not even about myself .

If you weren't my drugs to keep my smiles going , then i'll have the the real one to keep it going . And i swear ,it's gonna be the real smiles of mine.

If you weren't going to keep this lady by your side forever , let the other cherish and love her . Because i know there's still someone out there who wanna see her smile every single second .

I can be there when you need me , but you can't be here when i need you? =(
POWERHOUSE TONIGHT LADIES?

Take it . It's yours.

PS: Wanna feel how it feels like knowing someone you loved actually don't think that you'r that important to them?

baby , i love you still.

Been really really lethegic.
Shall upload his car's photo later or tomorrow .
Am still feeling dead . Update soon ~

DON'T WALK INTO MY LIFE IF YOU KNOW YOU'RE WALKING OUT SOMEDAY

LIFE

I'm too sensitive for words i know . I categories myself under emotional.
Xann talked to me on the phone . First time , i felt how serious she was . And of cause i know your meaning .
I seriously see no meaning in my life this year. Maybe these few months . A job is all i needed for now . To do everything i can , to have everything i can , to go anywhere i can with money .
Blame it on my laziness ! Ugh , bad point i have .
Alright i'll serioulsy take up a job okay . Not for anyone , perhaps just for myself . Weather to earn money or spent time wisely or make new friends ..
To me , this period is for growing up . To learn more thing and see more peoples. So there's such person in the world .
I can still continue having this kind of life . i just needed get a job , be it part time ot full time .

Some things it's so hard to open my mouth and tell you . Be it a secret or lies . That's why i said , i don't feel myself . Memories been really bad . Can't remember what i did .
Someone told me , do you feel bad ? Yes i do . But the thought of the hurt i've been taking or taken . Maybe it's more then enough to cover all the hidden truth . Maybe its all an excuses or stupid reason . I know . But accept it  , cause it's my explantion for myself .
As for my friends , like i said words and action is just a thin line in between . Actually i don't even know what i wanna say or explain . Trust me , i need a break in this country . Not that i'm having stress . I mean , yes i do  but it's not that serious . But anyway , i just wanna get out of here for maybe awhile . I need to get some fresh air ! (:

That's why i said " Don't ever tell a lie , because it won't be just A lie at the end of the day.. "

SARA ! Please get your ass back to the bed now . Close your eye and rest your body !

let me be there

A night without Ph again ! Nice feeling btw . Went to the Macdonald at Bukit Timah with him . The first place we went to that first time. Ate Cheese burger ! Like wow , so nice la ! Then went rounding .. Cause west side people are so boring . LOL . Went to a number of places , seems like going to hunt for ghost . But end up somewhere peaceful and chill down there . (:

Seriously , for these 20 years . I have never been in a relationship with someone like him . As in , handling with important stuff and money issue . It's not a bad thing too , cause i know i'm learning to grow even more . To see the world from him . It's not all about love . It's not love we had . There's politics and stuff .
Love, I'm here for you to talk to . I'm here to listen to you . Don't be afriad to tell me anything . Anything.
I won't even look down on you . Infact , i'll be there to cheer you up if you don't mind . Trust me . We'll go thru all this together . Although , i might not be of any helps but just let me be there . =)

I KNOW YOU FEEL STRESS AND SUCKY NOW . IMAGINE THE PERSON YOU HATE AND HIT ON THE PILLOW ! HAHA.

If one day i lost my memories

Well , thanks to xann 's messages that woke me up and fucking made me so awake now. I'm damn tired and exhausted yesterday night . It seems really long that i feel this way . Anywhere , you can fall asleep anywhere . Alright shall update what's happening ....

Saturday - A night without spending at ph . Went rounding and hunting for food and nice place to chill out with him. *Thinking in process .. * Met him in the afternoon then went to PS for movie - A back-up plan.
Really nice show (:  Went shopping . Saw one really nice Hello Kitty watch . Have you met a guy this way .... He told you he needs the toilet so we went . He insist that i go too , so i went . When i'm out , he just look elsewhere and pass you a plastic bag with something inside . I was mad la , cause i don't even want him to waste money . But a part of me feel so delighted , happy - the word to be used . I smiled of cause , he's not romantic . I don't need someone romantic , i just need someone who can make me smile . Well , after movie , we went rounding . LOL cause we had nowhere to go . So we went for bak kut teh at saltun. Been really long since i went there.
So we went to sentosa after supper . Walking on the beach at Sentosa at night is something i always love to do (: Sat down and shut the eyes and listen to the sea  . Peace - Is what you'll feel at that moment( especially with someone you love) . Quiet - Is what i wanted (Just with someone you trust) . After that, went back to the usual place for some rest . Don't know why but the both of us just slept like nobody business , too tired for anything .
Next morning went back home for mother's day breakfast (:
" You're the first person who really slept inside my car " Then remember me for i'm the first .

I seems busy , yet i don't know what i'm busy with but i'm just not free .
Last night , he got an accident . Luckily nothing happen except that the car need some operation. Accompany him to the car garage and left his wifey there for some minor opt. But with a sum of money . LOL. Then took train to Vivo , walk around and sat down somewhere . I feel really good sitting there doing nothing , thinking of nothing and without any words . It's a great feeling.
I've been feeling so stone for the whole day . Mood swing . No appetite. But feel so much better after some fresh air . Went home after that , slept untill she msg me ! Tired out man .

What's with caring for somebody else who doesn't appreciate. For friends or for anyone else . Hmmm ?
I'm glad i'm here and there for you , to see you breaking down and cry infront of me . Put aside anything that makes you this way . But i see how you cared for everyone. It's not about how long you know that somebody but it's about how much you understand that somebody . It's not about trust but the bond and the feeling . Be it that weather in future we'll kill each other with a knife or we used to hate each other for some reasons . I chose to be there when you need someone . That's the least i could do anyway . Know what you're doing , know your limit for everything . Leave some space for yourself . You needed some fresh air . 
I'm just a phone call away if you need me . You can tell me " Fuck care this , fuck care that .. " But i know how sucky it feels deep inside . you don't have to be strong when you look me in the eye cause i feel the weakness in you . You're weak . Sara , one thing i have to say . I'm glad that i'm there when you're at the lowest point . Stay positive .

It's the footprint we left there , it's the path we've walk together before .

before one day i forget the feeling , bring me back to look for it again .

Because i'm alway the one who watched you walking away ..

What's best when it can't be the best anymore? If having to be in a state of clear mind and to be troubled . Then i'll rather be in half consious. Or maybe , just nothing .

If you were those drugs , i'll chose to have it everyday and keep myself addicted even if at the end of the day , it'll bring harm to me..

Sometimes i wonder , why ?

Why is there unhappiness . Are we born to solves problem ? Then why are we even born.

The point here is , because unhappiness might lead to happiness .

Feelings don't last , if it's not being maintance well .

I could love you like it's the end of the world now . but if one day , i'm too tired to hold on to you anymore or if i collapse one day . Live your life to the fullest . Because i know , you have your dreams you have your love and you have your future .

Look for girls who calls you their love. Look for girls who tears without any reason but just by looking in your eye . Look for girls who'll wait patiently . Look for girls whose willingly to do anything beyond the expectation .

And girls , who'll want to have your baby without asking you to be responsible for that.

If one day , you gonna leave again . Leave me with a baby of yours , so i could keep the love forever .

My love for you is like the batteries , and you're the charger .

BUT If one day , it goes flat and it couldn't be charge anymore, keep it aside .

Alright, I find myself naggy .

Night , to all that i love .

Lastly , never tell a lies because it'll never be just one lies .

I'm sorry if i lied .

I JUST FEEL SO SUCK NOW.

You're my drugs

Somehow , i still love the feeling when the mind isn't working . So you'll do thing physically not mentally .

Logical thinking

Treat your girl right , or someone else will ..

Party time

ITS MY PARTY , MY DAY AND MY CALL !

Well , IT'S LADIES NIGHT again yesterday . Slept at 8am and woke up at 11am yesterday morning then went to work with peizhen . Alright , not exactly working . End work and went home at about 7.30pm . Bath , prepared and changed then went downstair to meet love . Then to fetch peizhen to PH .

Don't have to queue for ladies drink , thanks to David . Save our time ! haha . Then brother and gang came . Kinda lots of things happened last night actually . Its our "Family" problem ! LOL . Didn't really drink actually , but at first was kind of tipsy . But end up have to run here and there to take care of this take care of that . So damn piss off last night . Went out and saw love so towards the end , we both just sat there and talk. He's running a fever and i knnow how bad it feels . So i stayed there with him . I can't be bothered with he people inside too . LOL . Better not to see and know too much . Haha . So close both eye ! I saw tears in his eye , i felt something wasn't right but i guess it isn't time to ask about anything too (:

Here comes the end of the night , same song to end the day - Bad Romance . But we are not inside but at the smoking area . Well , i'm happy so anywhere also can dance ! Then went to pick up the car and head back home . Something happen on the way but like i said , it's family problem ! Haha .
Send pz home then both of us went home together (: He slept when i went for bathe , so i just help him get towels and water . And unbutton his shirt for him !!! LOL
Oh ya ! Everyone including me and pz wore SHIRT last night ! Like so coincidence(: Wanted to take family photo ! But end up alot of problem .. But still the night ends well =)

PS: Let me be there when you're sick,so i could take care of you. Let me watch you when you fall alseep,so i could be there when you got shocked by your dreams and get you back to dreamland again .Let me be there to stay with you when you're alone so you won't be alone . Let me be there when you're tipsy so i could hold you back when you falls . Whatever it is , i'm fine i guess .
When one day , you have to leave again  or when you don't need me anymore . Tell me .. I'm still the same , just let me be there for you for the moment . Maybe one day , you'll suddenly tell me . You're getting married , i really don't know what to do but , i'll try my best to ....
Love , i senses something thru your eye . though i don't know what's happening but those photo we took together , i see happiness in both eye (:

Loving him doesn't mean to have him , but to see the smiles on his face once more ..

The genuine smile =)

BORED BORED BORED

Last night went out with pz and wl for supper at geylang 126 . And some others . Then went back to pz's there for some chilling out (: Went home in the morning about 7 and slept at 9 . because by then , then manage to fall sleep .

Have a safe trip Nic .

IM BORED !

BORED

I'M SO BORED .

Bring me out anyone ?! awwwww, bored to death .
I WANT TO FUCK HIM UPSIDE DOWN !!!!!!

I FEEL LIKE SETTLING DOWN SOON , love .




What if one day , i turn my head and walk away alone . Would be you infront when i lift up my head?
I miss him . How can i ever let you know , how much i really do.

The day at PH

Loved Of The Photos . Love you Too x.x (:

I felt like a princess last night . With someone to protect when in trouble . Someone to loved and cool you down. Headed to PH with peizhen , dave and jason . Drank some Martini which i bought from home . Looked at their expression and you'll know how funny it is . LOL . So met das and the gangs inside .
Jian Rong's birthday as well , so went to their table and sat , played games and drink with the girls . Been rather long since we gather (: Nice feeling out of it .

Something happened halfway thru . I'm just wondering , if that someone says she misses you , she likes you but yet she pull and push you around in the club . Is it how it's supposed to be? Anyway , i just need time away from her i guess .

After the incident, we went back to the table . Dance and played around .
End of it , the 2 of us went 81 for rest again that morning . Again , we listened to the radio and fell sleep together . I watched him fell sleep . Tears dropped down my cheek. It's the tears of joy. But partly , how much i wanted to tell you that moment . Are you gonna leave anytime now ? Woke up at 11am , went home . so sleepy but i had a great day . Really .  And i love the feeling whereby , nobody cares , nobody bothers , nobody interrupt at all ! (:
Last friday and saturday is the day which i'll look forward to . And i really do . Because i know , when the time is there , i could see him soon ..

Sometime , i really wish that i don't actually think too much .
Sometime , i just wish that you could just stay ..
And say , that you'll never leave me ever again .

LOOK AT THE MONEY BEHIND(Jason)

Well , Ugly side of people ! :X

Tell me , are they GAYS?

But i know , it will never come true ..

But i still love you , nevertheless .